My Google Husband

Last night my husband and I were typing random things into Google just to see what popped up. You know, as you do on a Friday night. Anyway, while we're busy wasting time Rob says, 'why don't people google things straight away when they think of them? Like, how come you ask me how to spell something instead of looking it up on Google?' I told him it's because he's a human, and he's there, and he says, 'yeah, but it's quicker typing it into Google and Google's there as well,' so I said, 'fine, well maybe I'll just google myself a husband and ask my Google Husband things!'

Cos this is how we argue.

A little later on Rob calls me over to his computer to show me something. He's made a little program on Java so that when you press enter a little window pops up that says 'LOVE YOU.' 'Can your Google Husband do that?' he asked.

A little while later still we're getting ready to do the dishes (cos that's just how we roll on Friday nights) when Rob says, 'don't worry sweetie, I got this. You go have a lie down.' At which point I thought to myself, I should have threatened Rob with a Google replacement years ago. But this thought was followed by the realisation that Google threat or not, my husband always offers to do the dishes, and is always making little programs to say he loves me. 

So I'm sorry, hypothetical Google Husband. Maybe if I was married to someone else we could have had a future together, but as it is you just don't stand a chance. My real-life husband is just too good.